I emceed the American Jewish Press Assocation awards banquet and reception Tuesday night at the Russell Senate Caucus Room on Capitol Hill. Emcee, right? So I had a whole monologue written, but then the timing went kaflooey, and by the time the Israeli ambassador spoke and the chicken came out of the kitchen, we ran out of time.
So here’s my monologue, minus some of the inside jokes.
I’m so proud there’s an American Jewish Press Association. It’s so impotant to give Jews the opportunity to work in the media.
And I love how forward-thinking the organizationation is, embracing new technologies and new media. Which you can see by the AJPA logo — which features a quill pen.
Apparently this is a step up from the previous logo, which had a stylus and lump of clay.
Of course, this is an industry whose single biggest news provider is called the “Jewish Telegraphic Agency.” They recently dropped “Telegraphic” from the name, which was a relief to members who never got used to that newfangled telegraph contraption.
I don’t mean to pick on the JTA, but you gotta love a news organization that features actual headlines like “Iowa Jews minimally affected by flooding.” The Midwest is under water, but the Jews are okay! Coming tomorrow: Why God is angry at the goyim!
That reminds me of the classic JTA headline: “Two Jews die in Turkish earthquake.” 15 THOUSAND people died in the quake, and JTA found the two dead Jews. What would they have written if they hadn’t? “Big quake narrowly misses Israel.”