Mark Weiner with daughters Brianna, seven, and Sari, three. Mark died of cancer in May. Jewish Federation of Greater Middlesex County paid for Sari to attend camp at the East Brunswick Jewish Center.
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August 18, 2009
In April, Rachel Weiner got a call reminding her that her three-year-old daughter’s fee for 2009 summer camp had not been paid.
And that’s when it hit her. “I had just brought my husband home from the hospital on hospice care and had just paid $5,000 for a private nurse,” recalled the East Brunswick resident. “I was now the primary breadwinner, and my money was going for my dying husband.”
Weiner told Laura Grunin, the camp director at the East Brunswick Jewish Center, that she would get the $1,775 for the fee. “I wasn’t sure how I was going to pay, but I knew Sari had to be in that camp,” she said.
Sari, who had already attended preschool at EBJC, “felt so safe and secure in that building,” said Weiner, director of social services at an Old Bridge nursing home. “For the last two years she watched her father so sick every day; she knew he would be gone soon.”
It was important, Weiner said, that she attend the camp at EBJC, which “was filled with happy memories and loving teachers and laughter for her. Her friends from school were there.”
To Weiner’s surprise, she was soon contacted by the Jewish Federation of Greater Middlesex County about obtaining a camp scholarship. Such scholarships are part of Middlesex Cares, a federation-funded program initiated in response to the economic downturn. A joint project of the federation and Jewish Social Service Committee of New Brunswick and Highland Park, Inc., Middlesex Cares helps individuals referred by the federation, rabbis, or Jewish Family and Vocational Service of Middlesex County.
Middlesex Cares also provides help in cooperation with JFVS to kosher meals-on-wheels and food pantry, vocational programs, and job networking opportunities.
The federation contacted directors of nonprofit Jewish day camps in the county, offering aid to parents who might otherwise be forced to quit their jobs to care for their children, said federation executive director Gerrie Bamira.
While Rachel Weiner did not technically fall into this group, her story was so compelling the scholarship committee immediately approved her application.
“Being a social worker, I’m honestly embarrassed to say I was unfamiliar with what Jewish federation could do, but I should have known,” said Weiner. “I work with geriatric patients, linking them to services in the community — without realizing I needed help myself.”
The letter informing the family they had received a full scholarship arrived on May 11 — Mark Weiner’s 44th birthday — providing a man in the final stages of cancer with a very special present.
“My husband looked at that letter and said, ‘That’s what a real Jewish community does, helps each other,’” said Weiner. It brought him great comfort, she said, to know that his family, which also includes daughter Brianna, seven, would be taken care of by the community.
Mark Weiner, a lawyer, died 10 days later.
The couple both grew up at East Brunswick Jewish Center. Their parents, David and Jackie Weiner and Helene and Mark Schrager, still live in East Brunswick.
Rachel said her husband was active at EBJC and “loved going to shul” every Saturday. She still goes with her daughters every Shabbat morning. “He never complained through all the radiation and chemotherapy and all the operations,” she said. “He never cried. He never showed fear or self-pity. He continued working as a lawyer until his condition worsened at the beginning of 2009. My only wish is that my children marry someone like him.”
Federation president Lee Livingston also serves as treasurer of the Jewish Social Service Committee.
“There are scores of Rachel Weiner stories in this community that we deal with every single day,” he said. “This past year has seen a never-ending flow of heart-wrenching stories and people who are feeling as vulnerable as anybody can feel in our society.
“We will continue to help all the Rachel Weiners and others who have nowhere else to turn but the Jewish federation and Jewish Social Service Committee.”
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